How High Performers Overcome Burnout

Plug: Paul Leon here. I want to take my hat off for a moment and speak directly to you, the listener or watcher of our show here at The Managers Mic. Thank you so much for being a consumer of the show, and I want to take our relationship a step further. When you join our newsletter at TheManagersMic.com, I am going to give you a free resource called a selling script to help skyrocket sales.

Paul Leon: Melissa Colton, you have spent 20 years in commercial leadership, from inside sales through executive roles, and have collectively delivered over one billion dollars in new business. Now you are running your own business. What I like about you is that you know what it is like to override your body, your energy, and your personal life in the name of success until it becomes clear that the way you are operating, or the way someone else is operating, is no longer sustainable.

Plug: If you want to take that relationship further, and you are a business owner who wants a free sales audit of your current sales process to evaluate possible gaps and areas of improvement, and you feel like we can help you, please reach out to us directly at TheManagersMic.com, send us a message, and we will set up a free—

Paul Leon: Your work helps leaders perform at a high level without burning out or sacrificing their health, energy, or relationships. You had to learn how to do this the hard way, though. So now your mission is to make it possible, and easier, for others who struggle with these same challenges.

Plug: —30-minute consultation, no commitment at all. Just to take the relationship further, we can speak in real time. Thank you so much for being a listener and watcher of the show. And now back to the episode.

Paul Leon: You do not do fluffy sales coaching or shallow motivation. You do private advisory work and small, high-trust masterminds focused on how leaders can operate under pressure so performance becomes sustainable, not just something they have to survive. More or less, you help them thrive. You work with a limited number of executives because your time is tight and your work is so niche and specialized. These are confidential engagements with senior directors and vice presidents in one-on-one settings. If you are carrying significant commercial responsibility, growing your business, or preparing for the next level and want success without work consuming everything else that deserves your attention, I strongly recommend you follow Melissa Colton on LinkedIn and other social media platforms. Melissa, welcome to The Manager’s Mic.

Melissa: Thank you for having me. That was one of the loveliest introductions I think I have ever had, so thank you.

Paul Leon: You spoil me. I have a set of questions and, as you know and as people who have listened to past episodes know, I will typically ask some preference questions and then keep it conversational. One of the questions you sent me that sparked my interest was this: What does purpose mean in a business context? I want to peel the onion with you, Melissa, on that definition and what you are seeing across your clients and your own history of having a billion dollars in lifetime career sales. Let us peel the onion together.

Melissa: Yeah. My definition of purpose is fulfilling your soul’s purpose, which sometimes does not really belong in corporate language. You throw the word “soul” in there and everybody gets a little uncomfortable, so if you really need to, you can replace it with “heart,” or “desires,” or “passions,” or whatever feels right to you. But that is how I define purpose.

And the reason I define it that way is because I think a lot of people spend a lifetime asking themselves the question, “What is my purpose?” That leads to a lot of floundering around and a lot of wasted energy trying to figure it out. I got to a place where I realized it is really about fulfilling your soul’s desires, plural. I realized it is not just one thing. That helped me tremendously continue with my job and my career progression, but it also helped me realize there was so much more to life. It was not just about doing one thing and staying in one lane.

I like old cars. I like spending time with my friends. I like spending time in nature. I sometimes need more rest than other people. Those are my soul’s desires. Those are the things my soul actually wants from day to day. Once I realized it was really about honoring those desires and connecting with myself enough to even understand what they were, it felt like a pressure valve released. I had spent so much time pressuring myself with the question, “What is my purpose?” and trying to find one singular answer.

I think that is a huge part of the purpose conversation that gets done incorrectly. It gets done very, very wrong. Then that leads people into a lot of frustration, burnout, and even depression. Because then it turns into, “Why am I even here?” and that can become a very dark question to ask yourself.

So that is how I see purpose. That is how I live my life now: fulfilling my soul’s desires, honoring what my mind, body, and soul desire on any given day. And I am not saying that in a way that makes it sound easy. Sometimes it is still frustrating. Some days it feels like whack-a-mole. It is like, okay, I figured out what my body needs, now I have to figure out what my mind needs, now I have to figure out what my soul needs. Some days it can be tiring. But it is a lot less tiring than constantly running that question in your head and never really landing on an answer.

That is my definition of purpose, and I would love for more people to understand this about themselves, because I think it leads to a lot more satisfaction and peace in life than that constant question mark playing in the background.

Paul Leon: Yeah, I am with you. I am getting down with that. So I want to get down a little more with you in this conversation, if you are cool with that. I am curious, because you work with a niche group of people and because you have limited capacity, which is good because it means people get more white-glove service when they work with you, I am curious whether you see purpose looking different for different groups. And I am just going to be blunt. Do you feel like among your male clients there are common denominators in how they define purpose, while female clients might define it differently? Or maybe it is more about certain industries. I will let you take that wherever you want.

Melissa: That is a really, really good question. It is probably not something I have digested or peeled the onion on too much. I think part of that is because I see individuals as so different. Everybody’s heart is different. Everybody’s path is different. Everybody’s soul is different. That part of a person is extremely unique.

If I sit with your question a little, what comes up for me is that a lot of women, especially if they have families and are the primary caregiver in that family unit, sometimes struggle to see beyond the family and household duties as part of purpose. It takes a lot of time and energy for a woman to raise children, be hyper-responsible in that role, and maybe also have a career or desires outside the children. Then there are moments of major transition, like when the kids start going to school or leave the house, and now it becomes, okay, the kids are gone, now what?

So I would say that when thinking about purpose, a lot of women can have a tendency to lean into the children-raising and family-building piece. Then when they want something beyond that, they can feel guilt or shame about thinking beyond their children or their family. I do think there is a dynamic there with women that does not always happen the same way with men, although I think it can happen with men too.

With men, I think what I have probably noticed more often is a question like, “Am I allowed to think beyond providing for the family? Am I allowed to think beyond the general things men are supposed to do?” There can be a framework of, well, I am supposed to provide, I am supposed to get together with the guys, I am supposed to do male things. So I think there are some dynamics in those male and female roles.

But beyond that, I do not think about it too much through that lens because I truly see soul desires as such a unique set of desires for every person. It really is just about them being able to connect with themselves enough to see it.

Which, of course, we are not taught to do. What we are taught is: grow up, listen to your parents, maybe go to college or maybe go into the armed services, find someone to marry, maybe have a family, get a good job, build a career, save for retirement, and die.

Paul Leon: And die. Is that part of the advice?

Melissa: Right. That is the cycle, right? That is what we call the ants-marching syndrome, or being on the raging river of life where you do not really get a big choice in what happens. We get filtered into that idea. So stopping and actually thinking about what it is that you truly desire and asking different questions around that, instead of “What is my purpose?” or just defaulting to whatever is expected of you, that matters.

Paul Leon: Okay. Yeah. I definitely agree on some level. And I will get down with you by sharing a personal story. I am going to start saying that from now on, by the way. That is going to be my new catchphrase. People have noted that I say “peel the onion” a lot. My wife gets mad because, as an inside joke in our house, I will sarcastically say, “Get over it,” or “Grow up,” and that does not always work in a marriage. I want to be very clear, I only say it at times when I think it is going to be humorous. The trap I fall into is that I was a comedian for a long time, and I have done open mics, so I have to remember there is a difference between comedians and civilians. My wife has a great sense of humor, but I still have to remember she is a civilian. In the green room, it is a very different conversation. That was a weird word salad, but—

Melissa: Yeah.

Paul Leon: So for men who hear this—

Melissa: I love it. My husband always says to me, “You gonna make it?”

Paul Leon: “Are you gonna make it?” Okay. All right. So he has to stop saying that, and I have to stop saying “grow up” sarcastically. So for men who are hearing this, do not tell your wives, “Are you gonna make it?” and do not say, “Grow up,” if you want to save your marriage.

Melissa: Yeah. Or “calm down.” That is definitely baiting.

Paul Leon: Yeah, that never works. I have never heard somebody angry in a marriage get told to calm down and then say, “You know what, now that you say it…”

Melissa: No. If you want to rage-bait somebody, tell them to calm down.

Paul Leon: Yeah. Good redirection there. So I am going to give you a frame. I am going to share a personal story, and I invite you to coach me through it.

One of my lowest points was during the pandemic. I was laid off despite having strong success at that company. I remember applying to over 400 jobs. It was not until the last 50 applications that the interviews really started to come in. But the journey from zero to 350, let us say, was brutal. I struggled with not feeling like a man. Just being very real with you. My wife was working, I was on unemployment, and I struggled with just not feeling like I was enough.

Every time I got another rejection from an application, because those processes take so long, it felt like another twist of the knife in my stomach. That is a very dramatic way to say it, I know, but I am being real. So if you could go back and talk to Paul Leon during that time, or talk to someone in a similar situation who may still be in that hole, what are some key things you would say? Or what is a question you would ask that person to help them define purpose better? Because at that time, I would have said I had no purpose. I am being totally real with what I struggled with.

Melissa: And this is why I keep it broader than just, “What is your purpose?” Because in those moments, that is not really the right question.

And yes, you can swear. I will clean up my language a bit because otherwise your editing might just be a bunch of beeps. But that is exactly the point. That is not the moment to think about purpose in the way people often talk about it. I do not want this to get confused. Purpose is not waking up every day with rainbows coming out of your butt and saying, “Life is great.” That is not what we are talking about.

When I say fulfilling your soul’s desires and honoring those is your purpose, sometimes that means you are honoring the depression of your soul, the sadness of your soul, the feelings of “I am not good enough,” and “What the hell am I even doing here right now?” Right? So Paul, since you have children, I think this analogy will work for you. In that moment, you have to almost be the dad to yourself. Because in that moment, you are not in a place that feels good, vibrant, purposeful, or on top of the world. You are in what I would call a winter. Maybe even a disconnection. It is cold. It is barren. Nothing is really growing in that moment.

So that is not the moment to be all, “Yeah, life is good, I have purpose, and I am going to fulfill my soul’s desires,” in some fake, head-in-the-clouds way. That is more the moment to say, “My soul’s desire right now is actually to be comforted and consoled, because this feels terrible.” That is a way to connect with yourself that goes beyond what society tells us about how we are supposed to feel.

That is the moment to be the higher self, or the dad to yourself, and say, “Hey buddy, you are doing your best and I know you are. I know this does not feel good right now, but we are going to do this together.”

Just like if one of your children came home from school upset because they got picked on or the teacher put them in timeout and they had a bad day, you would not say, “Come on, buddy, cheer up, get it together.” You would say, “Tell me all about it. Tell me where it hurts. Tell me what is going on.” You would console your child more than you would try to motivate them with purpose.

So when I talk about honoring yourself, which is a huge part of how I teach people to live, because we are not taught this when we are younger, so much of that is about honoring your mind, body, and soul on any given day. A lot of times your soul has bad days. Your mind has bad days. Your body has bad days. Your job is not to pound the kid over the head and say, “Get it together.” It is to console yourself and make yourself feel safe.

What most people tend to do instead is go outward. They want the external world to make them feel better. That might be drinking, drugs, binge-watching, doom-scrolling, whatever. That is the human experience. It did not start because of social media. We have all dealt with this forever.

So what I would have talked through with you in that moment is more like: this does not feel good right now. So how can you console yourself while continuing to put one foot in front of the other, knowing that that is all you can really do right now? Just go through the cycle, rather than insisting, “I wanted this to be summer, I wanted it to feel good.” No. You are in winter right now, and winter does not feel good. And I am here for it, and I am here for you.

That is the kind of conversation I would have with someone in that moment rather than expecting them to be on top of the world.

Paul Leon: Right. That is a fair response. I am curious, with your clients, is there a consequence you see when people do not lean into your advice? How do they typically respond? I am curious. Do they ever just say no? Or is there more to it?

Melissa: It is interesting because I would not say I attract the type of person who thinks everything I just said is bananas or bogus. And if I did, I do not think we would work together for very long, because I am not here to convince anybody. I am just sharing what has kept me functional for the last almost 10 years, much more functional than the 10 years before that.

A lot of highly ambitious people, and I would say high performers especially, come from a place of fear rather than foundational security within themselves and foundational connection with themselves. So a lot of the work is shifting that ambition from a fear-based place into a highly functional, high-performing version of themselves. Not the version that is performing just to avoid getting fired, or to keep people from realizing they do not know what they are doing, or because of imposter syndrome. A lot of high-performer actions come from fear.

I would not say people I work with blatantly tell me no. But probably my most challenging “client,” and I am doing air quotes here, is my husband. He is a lot more clinical. He is a physical therapist. He has always had a very scientific background. He works with high-performing athletes. He cycles a lot. He does a lot of endurance training.

I have talked to him about these moments where, instead of saying, “Come on, what the hell, get your stuff together, what is wrong with you?” what is actually needed is turning inward and saying, “Hey, what is going on? Talk to me.” And then talking through that process with yourself. Again, just like I said with you and your kids, if your child is upset, you do not slap them on the back of the head and say, “Get it together.”

I do not know if that answers the question perfectly, but I would not say I have many people who respond with, “Melissa, what you are saying is nonsense.” Most are more like, “Huh.” Especially because I take the mind, body, and spirit or soul conversation in a much more practical and pragmatic way. I talk the way I talk, but at the end of the day I am a very practical person. I want it to apply to real life.

There might be some people, and I include myself in this, who feel skeptical when they first hear those concepts. When I first started thinking about the mind, body, and soul as something less esoteric and more real-life practical, it completely changed my life. I had heard those words together a million times, but I thought it was something reserved for yoga studios. Then I realized it applies to day-to-day life. Like, there are bells going off in my mind and in my body right now, so what do I do? Doom-scroll Instagram? Or actually connect with myself and see what is going on? Most people do the former, not the latter. So yes, I respect that some people hear those words and roll their eyes and think, okay, yoga studio girl. But I actually apply it to real life.

Paul Leon: I would say I am guilty of struggling with some of the more spiritual concepts. I remember a coach helping me once during all those job offers I mentioned, and I will never forget his advice. He said, “Paul, I want you to take some time, go into the bedroom, cross your legs, and envision yourself getting the offers.” I am just being real with what he said. He was a guy too, which is funny because I think people assume that advice comes from a woman or some Russell Brand type character.

And in my head, I was like, this is a little woo-woo for me. But I did it. And honestly, part of me thought, this is dumb, and another part thought, this is helpful. Lo and behold, I did end up getting competing offers. I am not saying it was because of that advice. I have a feeling those 400 applications had something to do with it too. But I will admit that the exercise of trying to align with your heart’s desire and stay connected to purpose helped. It was not a silver bullet, but it helped.

So I am curious. How do you maintain a consistent connection to purpose in your own life? Maybe someone else does not do what you do, so maybe you can help close some gaps for them.

Melissa: Yeah. I will start by saying it is nearly impossible to stay in a certain zone of connection all the time. I say that because anybody who tries to will be wildly disappointed, because we are human beings having a life experience on Earth.

I would also say that creating your own practice around this is wildly helpful. I do not try to shove my practice down anyone’s throat because I think it is different for everyone. Some people reconnect with themselves by going on a nice long walk in the woods. Some people reconnect by swimming. I have a really good friend who is a swimmer, and she goes out into a lake by herself and swims, which would freak some people out, but that clears her head. Some people pray. Some people go to church every Sunday. There are all kinds of ways to reconnect with yourself. It is up to you to figure out what that looks like.

For me, I do try to meditate every day for 30 minutes. And I was absolutely one of those people who used to say, “I do not have time for that.” That was never in my makeup. I was always very outcome-based. If I am spending time doing something, it better have a tangible result or I am not doing it.

But what I found when I started reconnecting with myself was that I had a lot of conversations with what I would call a soul connection. What does my heart actually want? Where do I really thrive? What do I really want to do? When am I really upset, and what do I do about it? That was much of the work, because I had completely disconnected from a lot of my life. I was much more driven by my mind and what my mind wanted to do all the time.

And spoiler alert, if you are doing that, you will probably find yourself in the wrong place, because the mind is a big fat ego, and it is driven by safety and outcomes. So the second half of my journey, or movie, or whatever you want to call it, after what I would describe as my awakening, was really about understanding the mind’s role in all of this.

That is where things like visualization come into play. It is more about getting your mind on board with what you desire. Whether you think of yourself as the CEO of your life, the queen of your life, the mom or dad of your life, if you sit above your mind, body, and soul, then those are the three things that make up your life. Just focusing on the soul all the time means you are neglecting the other two. If you are the CEO, that would be like ignoring two other business units. You cannot just focus on one and let the other two suffer.

So the second half of this for me has really been about commanding the mind. And I think that is what that person was trying to help you with. Whatever the mind goes on and does inevitably comes out in your action and your energy. It sounds a little woo-woo when you talk about energy fields, but the actions are tangible. Those are practical and pragmatic.

If your thoughts are, “I am the worst human on Earth, nobody wants to hire me,” those thoughts are going to come out somehow when you show up to an interview. Your thoughts will always come out in physical form in some way, whether you realize it or not. So if that is true, then how do you command your mind into a thought process and belief system that actually benefits you in your career, your marriage, your parenting, your hobbies, whatever?

That means taking what is in your heart and conducting it into your mind without letting it get distorted. For the people who cannot see me, I am literally pointing from my heart to my mind. You have to conduct that. You cannot just leave it up to fate.

So yes, I am a big believer that if you want something in life, you cannot just say, “I want a new job, so I am going to sit every day and meditate on getting a new job for eight hours.” Something might come from that, but I think a lot more comes when you combine the two. Your beliefs shape your energy. Your energy shapes how you show up to do the work. If your thoughts and beliefs are not aligned, then when you go to do the work, it becomes heavy and exhausting.

So to your point, it is probably both. It is not either-or. It is the ability to command your mind with what your soul’s desires are, and then take action. A lot of people say, “I feel this, and I want to do this,” and then they hit the brakes because they have not worked with their mind enough to actually move.

And I am 100 percent the kind of person who believes that, whether you are spiritual or not, there is a lot of talk throughout history about “sweat on my brow.” The higher power, however you define it, does not want to see you sitting on a couch eating bonbons. Life is about effort. It is about experience. It is about showing up. Sweat on your brow usually gets the goods.

Paul Leon: I genuinely loved a couple of things you said there. I think you were trying to say the law of attraction, but you called it the law of whatever. And I genuinely kind of love that. There is part of me that thinks there is a book in that. “Today I am going to train you on the law of whatever.” I feel like there is something there.

Melissa: Yeah. There are all these laws out there, right? Maybe we just birthed something: the law of whatever.

Paul Leon: I feel like we did. If you ever write that book, I want everyone to know Paul Leon helped birth the idea, but it is Melissa’s book.

The other thing you said that made me laugh, and I told you I have a comedic mind, was when you said if someone is meditating for eight hours, my thought was, yeah, that is called homelessness.

Melissa: Yeah.

Paul Leon: I am going to do something kind of fun that I had planned and you did not know I was going to do. Are you familiar with Paula’s podcast at all? My wife has been listening to it.

Melissa: I am familiar with it. I would not say I am a regular listener.

Paul Leon: That is fine. I am literally stealing one idea from an episode I heard. It is only one question, do not worry, then we will get back to the core stuff. It is like an improv question. I give you a topic, and you have to pretend on the spot to be the expert on that topic. It is just for fun. Are you ready?

Melissa: I do not know, but give it to me.

Paul Leon: You are now the expert on making floss swords. Go ahead. You have one minute, and I am going to time you.

Melissa: I am sorry, what? Floss swords?

Paul Leon: Yeah, those little plastic floss things you put in your mouth. Not like Game of Thrones swords. A floss sword.

Melissa: Oh, the little plastic ones you put in your mouth?

Paul Leon: Exactly. My dentist says you are not supposed to use them, but I do not know if that is true. So hit me with your best expert take, and do not worry, we can edit it out if it is dumb.

Melissa: No, do not edit this out. You just helped me become the expert in it. So floss swords—according to some dentists, you should not be using them, but in reality, you should if that is all you are going to do. Because using floss swords is better than using string floss if you are never going to use string floss. Using the floss sword gets your teeth cleaner and gets junk out from between them better than doing nothing.

So we might as well use them, even if dentists think you should not. Floss swords are small plastic tools with a little piece of floss stretched between them. We do not advise that you use them more than once. One time on the top, one time on the bottom. So maybe you are using two floss swords, which is probably a better way to go than using one floss sword for your whole mouth. Am I at a minute yet?

Paul Leon: No, you still have 30 more seconds. Go.

Melissa: Floss swords come in all colors: white, green, pink, neon, whatever you want. We even have children’s versions of floss swords. Floss swords are made out of plastic, which I think I already said. They come in very small bags, and there are many of them, so you can use as many as you would like. We are trying really hard, though, to make them in a way that is maybe not recyclable, but more reusable.

Paul Leon: All right, you got your minute. I got you. You were probably hoping I would not let it go any longer. But I think you did pretty good.

Melissa: You should have seen me sweat harder than that. I actually think I did pretty good. Have you ever done that with any other guests?

Paul Leon: You are the first one. We had some text conversations before this, and we met through another community, so I felt confident you had enough of a sense of humor to handle it.

Melissa: Well, not to mention I spent 20 years in sales. When I work with entrepreneurs especially, I am not always in their world, and I will start rattling off how to talk about their offer or their business, and they will be like, wait, how? And I will say, because I can get convicted and compelled about nearly anything if you tell me to. Just not bad stuff, but good stuff, I can go all day.

Paul Leon: Exactly. It is good to have people in your life who hold you accountable and keep you grounded in reality. I have the gift of gab like you. I was once in a meeting talking about a software solution, and I have a friend, Brian, who is so logical. He probably has some similarities to your husband. He is so clinical. He can stand still like a statue for five minutes, and for me that is torture. But you need those people. I was talking about some software and said, “Here is our award-winning software,” and he just looked at me and said, “What award have we won?” And I was like, none. I just said it because it sounded good.

So for those who are more serious listening to this, hopefully the humorous people enjoyed that part. You mentioned sales, and I really do want to explore that part of your experience, because one billion dollars in lifetime sales is not easy. I would argue there are not many people who can do that. So it is very impressive. How did your personal experience with sales highlight the importance of connecting to purpose behind the work and the money earned? I want to peel the onion there.

Melissa: Yeah, that is a really good question. I would say I have never sold anything I did not 100 percent believe in. There are people who go into a role and either do not believe in the service or the product, or maybe they do not even believe in themselves. So I think that is the combination that leads to success.

For me, I have been really fortunate to work at some great companies with some great people. That led to much of my success. Not to downplay my own success or skirt around it, but honestly the people I worked with in that achievement were phenomenal. Really intelligent people. Really caring people.

Much of the industry where I was able to achieve that was clinical research, so drug development. And yes, these days drug development can get very political, but what I would say is that what we see in the news are the big pharmaceutical companies making billions and billions of dollars. What we do not see is the small baby biotech with five people working there, scraping together enough money to run a study that might save someone’s life. That is the part people do not see. But that was the industry I was in.

So you can imagine how compelled I was to help those people. I had a very strong win-win-win mindset. I wanted my company to win the work because I wanted my company to do well. I wanted to win the work because I wanted myself to do well. But I also wanted that biotech company to win. I truly believed in the companies I worked for and their ability to take that money, that a baby biotech had scraped together, and put it to work to figure out whether a drug was going to save somebody’s life or not.

In many cases, it did. My best friend was actually one of those people. She went on a clinical trial, and it quite literally saved her life.

So a lot of people do not see that side of the drug or pharmaceutical industry. We all have this idea in our heads that there are only these giant billion-dollar companies. And yes, those exist. But there is also a huge ecosystem behind those huge pharmaceutical companies that the average person does not know about or think about.

One of the significant things for me in my career is that I worked for really good companies that I could fully get behind. I do not know if there was ever a point where I thought, this company is complete trash and I need to get out of here.

Paul Leon: Right. I would say I can relate to that in some of my own experience. There were some jobs I took when I was in tough financial situations where it was just like, I have to do this. But for the most part, I can relate to you there.

You used the phrase “baby biotech.” I usually look up definitions after a podcast and paste them into the video because I do not want people lost. After I interviewed a guy from the military recently, I had to do that with a bunch of military terms because I was editing and realized I did not know what half of them meant. So I am genuinely curious. What does “baby biotech” mean to the common person who does not work in or sell into pharmaceuticals? I do not care about the political side. I just mean outside of that lens.

Melissa: Yeah. “Baby biotech” is probably not an official industry term. I do not think a biotech company would call itself a baby. Maybe they would. But it is more the way people around the industry might describe those companies. We are basically talking about a little-engine-that-could kind of company. They do not have multi-billion-dollar funding behind them. They do not have a blockbuster drug already out there making billions. That is not their world.

Their world is more like—sometimes we would jokingly say “two people and a molecule.” Or two women and a molecule. It is a group of people who grab a molecule off the shelf at somewhere like Johns Hopkins that some researcher in a lab decided to shelve, and they have the know-how to try to take it into the human experience, because at that stage it is just a lab experience.

So when I say baby biotech, and I hope no biotech founders take offense to that, I just mean organizations that exist, but they are not fully funded, not massive, not sitting on some blockbuster product. They are the ones creating those future drugs. And then the big pharmaceutical companies often come in, buy them, and commercialize the product. So those baby biotech companies are really the engine of creation and the future of medicine. They get a lot less attention.

Nobody knew who Moderna was until COVID. Moderna was a name I knew, but most people did not. It was not a huge blockbuster pharmaceutical company at the time. It just happened to be in the right place at the right time. Those are the companies doing the blood, sweat, and tears work to get a molecule or a drug to the next level where it can actually be approved and prescribed.

The runway before a drug gets approved and commercialized is massive. The effort is immense. Not to downplay the commercialization and sales part after approval, but the work before approval is massive. Those are the people out there doing the real work, and it is not easy. It is incredibly difficult and complicated. Just think about what it means to take an investigational product across country lines, into depots, finally to a site, to a doctor, who can then give it to a patient who has had to sign a multi-page consent form just to enroll in the study and take that drug. I could go on forever about the mechanics of it, but it is intense. Those baby biotechs are the ones really pounding the drum to get the next generation of life-saving drugs into the hands of people who need them.

Paul Leon: Since you were such a top performer and salesperson in that industry, I want to peel the onion as we come toward the end. What were you doing to be so successful? Reverse engineer it for me. What habits did you have? What frameworks? What were you reading? What were you listening to? I want to understand what helped you achieve those high-performing months.

Melissa: Yeah. There is a lot there. But to bring it back to one part of our earlier conversation, I am goal-oriented. And honestly, most of us are, even when people say they are not, because that is how the brain works. The reward centers in the brain want goals.

One of my craziest years was when I got to 200 million dollars. That year, I was actually pretty new to the outside sales role. And I was pissed because I thought I had a crappy territory. I was giving my boss grief about it, and he said, “What if you sold a hundred million dollars in that territory? Would you still be upset about it?” And I was like, obviously not. And he said, “Okay then. I do not know if you can do it, but maybe.”

So I made this massive board that looked ridiculous because it was practically the size of my office, which was not very big. I literally wrote “100 million dollars” at the top of it. Every contract I got signed and every award I won, I wrote it under my name. I was counting it down and I was going to do it.

So to wrap back around to visualization and using your mind and commanding your mind, yes, that was part of it. You see a goal, you go after it, and you take it seriously. There is nothing that irritates me more than when salespeople get targets and do not take them seriously. Why are you doing this job if you do not take that target seriously?

At the time, I would not have called it visualization. But in hindsight, yes, that board became that for me. I saw 100 million dollars every single day because it was right there in my office. It kept staring at me, and I did not stop looking at it until it was complete. And when the year ended and the calendar flipped, I kept that board up for a while because I wanted to look at it a little longer. When I finally erased it, I thought, man, that was a wild ride.

I would also say I was pretty humble that year. If I needed help, I asked for it. I did not try to fake my way through everything. Clinical research is an extremely complicated sale. It is not just, here is a widget, go sell it. There are a lot of moving parts, a lot of business units, a lot of leadership required just to get the sale across the finish line. So I asked for help when I needed it. I did not pretend I knew everything, because I could not possibly know everything.

I was also very resourceful with picking up the phone. When someone internally pushed back on me, instead of going back and forth over email forever, I had a rule that if we went back and forth once or twice, I was picking up the phone and calling my colleague so we could work it out instead of having some weird little email fight. I think that earned me a lot of respect inside the organization.

I took my internal clients very seriously, especially that second year when I was highly successful. I think one thing a lot of people miss in sales is that you have a lot of internal customers. And the happier they are, the more successful you are going to be, because when you need something, they are willing to help you instead of shutting the door in your face.

My first year, I was more of a Tasmanian devil. I was very young, very “I am going to succeed no matter what, get out of my way.” I had more of a “I do not need anyone to help me” attitude. That was humbling, as you can imagine, because a lot of doors got shut in my face internally. So the second year I said, okay, no. This was after some good coaching. I was very coachable. One of my managers, who I still adore to this day, coached me hard, and I accepted it. I received it. It was not fun sometimes, but I was willing to dust myself off, take the coaching, and do it better the next time.

So if I had to summarize, I would say I was very coachable, fairly humble that year, deeply committed to building internal relationships, and honestly probably more focused on keeping my internal customers happy than my external ones. And I always had a very strong win-win attitude. I did not want it to be all about me. I did not want it to be all about the customer either if that meant my teammates were left out to dry. If I committed to something to a customer that my teammates could not deliver, that was not fair. So I always tried to think, how can you win, how can I win, and how can they win? That served me really well.

Paul Leon: Melissa, I think—and I want to give you some compliments as a professional colleague—I think you have the gift of gab. You are very smart, very sharp, and your podcast, The Honor You Podcast, is very strong. I will put links to everything in the show notes, of course.

I do not want to end on a question that sounds apocalyptic, but I do think you are qualified to answer it. My wife and I talk a lot at the dinner table about AI disruption. People are losing their jobs quickly because of it. Companies are making big decisions without knowing how all of this is going to play out. So my assumption, when I look at the news and think about those conversations, is that people are struggling with purpose, trying to redefine themselves, dealing with burnout, graduating fear of job loss, and feeling like there are no career opportunities.

I know that is a heavy question, Melissa, but in 2026, what do people need to be doing to reconnect with their purpose? And what is one thing you would say to someone at their lowest point that will start moving them toward the right path instead of the rocky path of complaining and, as I say at home sometimes, having “wah-wahs” instead of wins?

Melissa: Yeah. This is going to be a pretty mechanical answer, and maybe I can add some less mechanical components onto the end of it. But what I would say is that a lot of my work, and really a lot of my business, is like wrapping something in bacon. People want the success, the money, the purpose. That is the bacon. But what is inside the bacon, what I know people really need but do not necessarily market directly because they would be like, what are you even talking about, is the idea of honoring yourself.

Wherever you are, whatever you need, mind, body, soul—it is so important. The way I define that is: recognizing, respecting, and responding to your emotional, physical, spiritual, and mental needs at all times, despite external or societal expectations. That is a mouthful, but that is what I am always trying to get people toward.

What we typically do in life is get so removed and disconnected from ourselves that we do not even know what those words mean anymore. We do not know how to connect with ourselves. We do not know what we want. Then especially when we get sucked into a corporate environment where it is eight to five or eight to six and you have to ask permission to go pick up your kids, ask permission to go to the bathroom, ask permission to take a vacation, it becomes ants marching again. We just do what we are told and stop questioning anything.

Then there are people who start to wake up and think, hold on, I do not think I want to stay in line with all these ants marching. That can become very uncomfortable. Some people step out, feel the discomfort, and go, never mind, I do not want to do this, I am going right back into the ants line. Other people are willing to step out, be a little lost, and figure it out. Those are the people who end up learning how to connect with themselves and honor themselves, and they tend to become much happier and more peaceful than the people who stay in the march while their soul is saying, “I do not want to be here,” over and over again like a heartbeat.

Some people pay attention to that before they have to. Others, like me, only pay attention when they are forced to. I felt like I was a little bit forced into it by what happened to me. Driving to work, having anxiety and panic attacks, not being able to get there. I had no choice but to look at my life and say, what is happening right now? I am completely disconnected from myself. I am overriding anything I ever really wanted in life.

That is my perspective on it. And yes, it is a massive onion to peel back. But if I go with the idea that the purpose of life is fulfilling your soul’s desires and honoring yourself, then it is kind of an endless game. However you get there is how you get there. That is your journey. But you have to start. And starting is really just beginning to pay attention to what you truly want at your core.

And it does take bravery and courage to do that, because a lot of times it means going against where you currently are and what you are currently doing.

Paul Leon: How did you get to this level of success and where you are today in your career?

Melissa: I give a lot of credit to my parents. They were very young when they had me, which makes it kind of amazing that my brother and I turned out the way we did, because they were basically children raising children.

After that, I would say much of the work I do now came out of a rock-bottom moment. I had a lot of career success. I was very successful in sales. I went all the way to what you would call the executive level. During that same time frame, I also hit a major rock bottom, which forced me into connecting with myself, honoring myself, figuring out what that meant, figuring out what purpose means in life, and realizing it is not just this one esoteric thing you may never achieve, or some singular thing that is impossible to find.

My rock bottom came from pushing aside even basic needs sometimes. There were days when I went through the day without practically eating. There was also a lot happening in my life. My best friend was dying of cancer. There was just a lot going on that I was not dealing with inwardly. I was going outward a lot, trying to soothe and solve things through the external world rather than my internal world.

Then one day I was driving to work and had what I did not realize at the time, but now absolutely know, was a panic attack. I kept pulling over on the side of the highway, getting back on, pulling over again, trying again. I did that about three or four times and finally had to throw in the towel and go back home. I could not even take the highway back because it freaked me out too much.

That led to needing help. That was not a moment where I was going to muscle my way through it. I had no idea where I was. I was very lost in the woods, if you will, because I had never experienced that before. Looking back, I now realize I had little warning signs before that and just shoved them aside and kept moving. I did not honor myself. I did not connect with myself. I just kept going until it all came to a head.

Then I was forced to face myself. I was forced to figure out what was going on, and I needed help to do it. Both of those things were very hard for me. So I would say to anybody experiencing stress symptoms: please do not ignore them. That is your inner world trying to tell you something in a really big way. And it may get to the point where you cannot ignore it anymore, because I could not. After that day, I could not even drive a quarter mile down the road without freaking out. So I really had no choice. I had to figure it out.

Paul Leon: And just know, Melissa, I always invite your feelings too. Recorded or offline, if you ever need me as a sounding board or however I can help, that door is open.